First Year Fear

I had been running from them for ages now. All of a sudden, my shoe laces came undone. I tripped and fell face flat in front of a brick wall. It was a dead end. Two large shadows peered over me and…

“Aaaaaah!”

I screamed and jumped out of my bed. There was a huge spot of sweat on my bed, as I noticed that it was a just a dream. All of this time, seventh graders have been creating illusions about how bad middle school would be. The orange sun arose from the east and black birds soared the bright sky. Calm chirps were in the air, and a nice aroma of flowers floated all around me. Even though all was calm around me, I felt a sting of nervousness run through my body. Today was the first day of middle school. Until last year, I believed that middle school was a piece of cake, but now I had to face it. Just thinking of it made me shiver with fear. A holler came out of the kitchen and I knew what that meant. In no time, I was ready, and I rolled on my bike to school.

Several new faces were seen at first sight. “Hey Jade” a familiar sound came. “Over here!” I turned around and found my BFF (Best Friend Forever). Her sparkled eyes and blond hair stood out. Cloe, my friend, was very brave and was ready for middle school. I strolled up to her and we hugged. We shared some memories from the summer until the bell rang. After that, a bunch of teachers filed in front of us. Neat lines were formed without a single racket. The orderly line was greeted by our headmistress. Like all headmistresses, a long speech began. Thousands of puzzling questions ran through my head. Why did we have all these classes, rules, and lockers? Sweat trickled down my back and my palms were getting slippery. 

After about forty five minutes, we were all dismissed to our classes. I had math first. This just made me feel worse, I didn’t like math at all. It was just the first day of school, and our teacher already announced a test for the day after tomorrow. I got that as you grow, you have more to study, but a test on the third day of school! That was too much! Somehow I pushed through the morning math time. As soon as math was done, I rushed to get my science things from my neat, decorated locker. Every second counted. This was terrible! I couldn’t remember my password for my locker! I was sure that I was going to be late for class. Four minutes wasn’t enough! I was running as fast as I could to class. 

My science teacher looked at me angrily. She pointed to an empty seat next to a drooling boy. I made a gross face of dissatisfaction, and I ambled slowly to my desk. So far my day had been a rush. Is this how middle school would always be, a race to finish classes and go to others? How am I going to get used to it? Fear overcame me, and I had no clue what to do. As I thought, I was late for every other class too! The whole day was a flop. In addition, I didn’t bring my gym bag. Who knew that P.E was every day? 

It was finally lunch and all I wanted to do was disappear. So many new rules and regulations. I just couldn’t take this anymore! Tears trickled down my cheeks. I nibbled on my sandwich slowly until the bell rang. Now it was time for arts. I chose band. Saxophone. Carrying the instrument was terrible since it has so much weight. But it was one of things that soothed me. Our friendly band director, Mr. David Dough (du-g), greeted us in with a broad smile, which stretched from ear to ear. With a new, clear mind, I started playing it naturally, like a professional. Since I have been going to classes, I was in the second level already! Time sped through so fast during band. All the kids left with a smile on their face. I hoped to hold this feeling for the rest of the day. 

We only had six classes and this was the end of my fourth class. ILA was next. I set off running to my locker near ILA, trying not to be caught running by the teachers. I stopped for a second to admire my own locker. But then, I heard the clock ticking away in the distance. I dashed off with all my text books and note books to my ILA class. A board read “Mr. David,’’ in front of his room. A frown was on his face as all the tardy kids strolled in. I noticed that Cloe and I were in the same ILA class and that she had arrived at the right time. I just didn’t know how she had done it. As usual, her warm, friendly smile comforted every one, and her cute, cat eyes made every one relaxed. I strolled up to the empty seat behind her and waved hi. Her beautiful blond hair turned gracefully around, and she returned the greetings. She turned to get her page in the textbook. I did so too, and the first thing I saw was all the confusing words and questions. Doing comprehensions have never really been my thing. The questions are always so hard for me. There was ninety five minutes of school left. Cloe’s face was so calm, without a single hint of stress. I had to get it together till the end of the day. I bent down to peak under the desk. A pair of large, black ovals crept closer to my desk. I realized that it was my teacher, Mr. David. Quickly, I picked my head up and wrote a random answer. He mounted over my work and a shadow covered my paper. I trembled with fear. Then, he made a miffed sound and rolled his eyes. He mumbled under his breath and strolled away. After getting at least something down, all of us turned our papers in for a grade. Five minutes before class ended, a huge homework packet got slammed on my desk. On the top, bold words read, “FOR A GRADE.” Why is everything we do (including homework) a grade? 

As I was just wondering how much more worse the day could get, a boy behind my desk flipped his water bottle. The lid had not been shut properly, so the water poured all over my hair, and I left the class period with a drenched hair. The water turned out to be ice water, hence I began shivering. The dripping water left a trail from ILA to my locker. I let out a big sigh. I glanced at the schedule sheet stuck inside my locker. Phew! History is the only one left to go. I headed to my history class. 

Surprisingly, I was the first one to arrive there. Just after I blinked my eyes twice, everyone filled in noisily. In my opinion, history was the easiest subject ever! Learning about the past has always been fun for me. My teacher, Mrs. Melissa, strolled in, wearing black wedges and a maroon skirt. Instead of passing out tests, she explained a project. Everyone had to make a three dimensional poster on the lives of certain Native American groups. I was chosen to create a poster on a group called the “Comanche.” Unlike other teachers, Mrs. Melissa was not harsh or strict in any way. Her beautiful brunette hair shone against the bright light of the sun. She also gave us a reasonable amount of time to finish the project. I ignored my wet hair that was dripping down my back. For the first time in the whole day, I payed attention to the teacher. The clock seemed to tick by faster. In no time, the bell rang loudly. 

We were all skipping outside, happy that the day was over. But all of a sudden, Mrs. Melissa called me. She explained that she too was a brand new teacher in the school. She was also scared and rushed. But then, she told me that a first year fear never ends. Ranging ages from a new born, all the way till the end of your lives, we experience something new every day. Sixth grade isn’t the only fear you need to overcome, but also other exposures you face for the first time. All you have to do is believe in yourself. 

This soothed me down and I calmed myself. Having someone to relax me felt wonderful after a bumpy day. All I had to do was have faith in myself.  I took a deep breath, and let it all out.